The 13 Behaviors: #5 Show Loyalty 2/2/2018

The 13 Behaviors: #5 Show Loyalty* Showing loyalty is about three things: giving credit, speaking about others as if they are present and always speaking of everyone respectfully. Giving credit is easy and builds trust quickly. This is because people naturally want to be noticed for their contributions and appreciate it when others recognize their work. Speaking about others as though they were present is a bit harder since so much of our culture today revolves around gossip but, there is nothing more disloyal than duplicity in our words. Always speaking respectfully of others can be hard too, particularly when people do bad things. One helpful idea, when the situation demands that you speak of someone's choices, is to focus on actions not character or motives. The counterfeit of these actions is: giving credit only when you have to and then claiming credit for yourself; publicly shaming others for speaking about others but privately doing the same and, speaking disrespectfully about others behind their back. Good leaders do good things but great leaders also watch their words carefully. The tongue can undo a thousand good actions with one dumb sentence. Both the book and the Strong Bonds curriculum explain these principals in great detail and help you figure out how to apply them in your context.** Army Leadership Doctrine: Loyalty is one of the seven Army values. ADRP 1 quotes the values " A loyal Soldier is one who supports the leadership and stands up for fellow Soldiers. By wearing the uniform of the U.S. Army you are expressing your loyalty. And by doing your share, you show your loyalty to your unit." These are good words but don't give much detail about what it actually means to show loyalty. In America we have the right to thought and action but just because we can speak poorly of others does not mean we should. Integrity means that our words and our actions go together but too often today people say that they are loyal but speak disrespectfully of one another. (perhaps this is why Billy Joel thinks honesty is a "lonely" word) *This is a reflection on a section of pages 152-157 of the book "The Speed of Trust" by Steven M.R. Covey which is the basis of the Strong Bonds curriculum The Speed of Trust for Families/Marriages/Soldiers. I highly recommend both! **CH Gramling posts a religious thought from a Christian perspective on the leadership thoughts each week at http://chaplainschatter316.blogspot.com